Mom time out

I am loving November. October was... SO busy. Too busy. November 1st came and it was such a calm day. I had no appointments, time constraints, pending projects, deadlines. All of November has been so refreshing. I've really tried to enjoy it and not rush into mad Holiday mode.

You know how kids have to get put in time out and they hate it? I would love it if I was getting out-of-control and someone said, HEY- go to time out. and I got to go to my quiet room by myself and think. Well I had 2 Mom time-outs recently. The first one came after a phone conversation with a friend of mine. I was alone after I'd put my kids to bed. My house was trashed, my husband was out-of-town, and I had a huge list of things to do for primary and Halloween. Plus trying to run my house, teach piano, and care for my kids mostly by myself. I was tired, over-worked, underpaid, and depressed. I tried not to let on to my friend how crappy I felt but I must not be a good actress because the next morning, she showed up with another friend of ours, and said "We're here to rescue you! Get out of here and go for a run." I was so embarrassed, humbled, and grateful. I started to bawl. My friends gave me hugs (which made me cry harder) and I put on my running shoes and left (they wouldn't take no for an answer). It is hard to describe the feelings I had. I was humiliated. But also amazed that my friends took the time to care for me. I felt so loved but so silly that my friends had to come bail me out--that I couldn't just take care of things myself. I will never forget what they did. A simple act of kindness. They gave me a time out that I really needed!

Time out number 2 came when I dropped my kids off at my parents'. My sis-in-law Abbey picked me up and we went to St. George. No kids, uninterrupted conversation. We met up with my MIL and Abbey's Mom for Time Out For Women. We had so much fun. 3000 women at the Dixie Center and no one got lost or freaked out because of the crowds. The messages were funny, entertaining, and inspiring.

They ended up buying the same shirt!

 

Our downtime included shopping, yacking our heads off, and eating delicious salads for every meal.  Fun bonding time with cool ladies!


This salad was amazing. George's Corner Restaurant - St. George

Mom's need to send themselves to time out more often. People don't usually give us time out unless we ask for it, plan it, arrange for the kids and the husband to be taken care of and then make it happen. It takes work for Moms to have a break. But we need to do it! We should remember to take care of the person who takes care of everyone else!

light of my life

Look how stinking cute my baby is. Holy Moley. She makes me happy. And so does this weather we enjoyed last week.

Here is my Mother's Day snapshot. Two out of five with eyes open... I'll take it.

I had Quinn dressed so cute for church and 5 minutes into Sacrament meeting, she blew out. Luckily I had an extra one of Mack's dress shirts in my bag, and it just happened to be pink. Mother's Day came around at the perfect time as this Mama has been a tad burnt out lately. The kids were sweet to me and Dax spoiled me with yummy meals and even did dishes. It was GREAT.

Shout it to the world!

He Can RIDE a BICYCLE!

My Hunter boy is a

S U P E R S T A R!

This goes down in history as one of my most proud Mom days. There is nothing like teaching your child to ride a bike and seeing them take off by themself for the first time! Times that feeling by 10 because this day has been so long in the making for this boy.

I LOVE you HuNTeR! You ARE so awesome!!

my lips hurt real bad

It's been a day full of service. I was on my way out the door this morning to get a few things for a dinner I was going to make for my neighbors when the phone rang. It was Preslie.

"Mom, can you bring me some chapstick? My lips are so dry and they are cracking."

Since I was already headed out, the grocery store is a block from the school, and it reminded me of Napoleon Dynamite, I took the girl some chapstick. I would have never called my Mom to bring me chapstick at school. I don't know if I am glad Preslie thought to do that or not. I digress..

So I grilled 16 hamburgers and took 11 of them to my neighbors. It is our pediatrician, his wife, and their 9 children. The Doc has seen every one of my kids once or twice in the past 2 weeks including a couple of house calls. He is the nicest guy and a such a competent doctor. (He is also the guy who saved Preslie last year when she had pneumonia.) I wanted to return the favor.

Then I fed my own kids and a friend and then watched my next door neighbors' little girl while they went to the cannery. She is such an easy going darling kid and it wasn't hard at all, but still I am glad I could help out.

I like doing things for people. It lifts my spirits in the best way. A lot of times I feel like I don't ever do much for others but then I think to myself, Hel-LO! A baby is a full-time service project as are toddlers and even older children. I do find joy in being a mother and a wife and I need to recognize the service I do in those capacities and probably find more ways to serve those in my home.

So whether it's bringing a child chapstick or doing something you know will make your Man happy, those little things will make YOU happy too!


Edit: This is Dax and I am adding this link

celebrate Motherhood

I love my babies. I work hard for and because of them. They bring me joy and frustrations. They light up my life. They have each left their mark on me physically, emotionally and spiritually. They are so adorable!

I am ever thankful for my Mom. I marvel when I stop and think of all she did to raise eight children. She taught us to work in the house and yard. She taught us to serve others. By her example she taught us to love and accept everyone because they are children of God. Four of my older siblings have worked in care centers with mentally handicapped people and I believe they developed those special abilities partly from watching my Mom love everyone unconditionally. My Mom instilled in me a strong faith and testimony of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. She taught us to work and save money for things we want or go without. She taught me to sew and create and scrapbook. She can make anything out of a milk jug. She truly gave/gives everything for her children. I know she is going to heaven.

I am thankful for my Grandmas. They always made me feel special and loved. They loved my parents and in turn, my parents love me.

I am thankful for my Mother-in-law. I know my husband's many good qualities came from her. She is generous, sympathetic, a good listener, compassionate, and a hard worker. She also loves adventure and having a good time. She is a wonderful Mother and a super Grandmother.

Mother's Day is so important. It gives us a chance to stop and think about what our Mom has done for us and remember all that we are we owe to her. I can't think of a more beautiful job than that of a Mother.

april fools to me

Mack started the day off right by pooping on the carpet. I didn't even cry this time. So he tried another aproach...


Nothing.

Then later...

Me: "Mack, what are you doing?"
Mack: "Squeezing toothpaste all over the carpet."
Me: "No, we don't do that. You have to go in your crib now."
Mack: (screaming) "No! Don't clean it up!"

I don't know why I didn't lose it like every other time in the past 2 weeks that he felt the need to destroy my life or my home. But thanks be to God that I was able to stay calm with him all day. Or maybe it is thanks to the fact my husband will be here for moral support in a couple days.



Or maybe it is because if this that you can't phase me today...



I've cleaned up otter pop, Cholula hot sauce, juice, milk, spaghetti sauce, sugar, blood, urine, feces, throw-up, butter, cereal, chili, etc.

but none of it has kicked my butt worse than

Peanut Butter.

Mack and peanut butter are similar in a lot of ways.

taking time for kids

The kids have been bringing home papers for weeks about a poetry reciting contest at school. I kept meaning to find a poem for Preslie and Hunter to memorize and time kept eluding me. This past Monday, Preslie comes home and says, "Hey Mom, I told my teacher I would do the poetry contest so can you find me a poem that I can bring tomorrow?" The day before something is due is never an opportune time to do it but.. I did find her one (with a grumpy, bad attitude because I of course had a bunch of other stuff I was in the middle of). She brilliantly memorized the 16 line poem in about 5 minutes (and Hunter and Mack almost had it down, too) and performed it for her class the next day. Each teacher was to choose the 3 best kids from their class to perform their poems for their parents. This morning I realized that today was that day and asked Preslie if she had been chosen to recite hers and if I needed to come. She said she didn't know and I sent her off to school. A few minutes later, she calls from school and says she is going to be in the contest with the other 2nd graders and I need to come.

I go and am waiting for her grade to come to the gym, and trying to distract Mack from running through the school, I was showing him pictures on my camera.. which I realized were ALL of him. He has just been so darn cute lately! And also really naughty taking off his diaper whenever he poops; I've been scrubbing carpet every day. He also finds the most creative (messy) ways to eat and drink. It is so naughty but we all laugh 'cause we can't help it! This face has magic powers over me...

He is so darling to watch play in the snow. He loves to dig but mostly just eats it. Doesn't matter if it's on the road or sidewalk, gravelly or clean or in the buffalo chute, he'll eat it.

I was showing Mack all these cute pics of himself and he would not hold still and kept screaming, "Help! Help! Help me!" as I was trying to contain him and quiet him so the parents could hear their darlings recite poems. There were about 19 kids so it took a bit for them all to get a turn and for the judges to make their marks after each child.


Preslie went and I could tell that she was nervous but she did really well and I was proud that she still had it memorized and spoke clearly.



Well, she won FIRST PLACE!


The look on her face was so priceless; she was shocked! Then she could not stop beaming. I just wanted to run up there and hug her guts out. It was so fun.

She is now invited to go to the district competition next week. I learned a lot of Mom lessons this week like- taking time to help your kids try something new and fun pays off. And- fighting a two-year-old to sit and be quiet can have its rewards, and mostly I need to have a happy attitude when it comes to helping my kids. After all, they are why I chose to be a Mom. So I might as well do it with smile!

good things

I was craving homemade chicken noodle soup (with homemade noodles even...my MIL's recipe- awesome), so Thursday I made a huge pot. With my husband gone working many many hours, I knew I'd never eat it all so I suddenly got a brilliant idea to invite some girls over for lunch the next day. I was in need of some fun because I live on the coldest part of the planet and I don't think being cold for this long and not being able to go outside or have the sun shine on you is healthy. And single digit temps really limit what you can do for fun outdoors.

Three girls came over to eat soup with me Friday and I think it boosted everyone's spirits. JayeCee, Macy, and Leslie came with all or part of their kids and we had so much fun chatting that after a while I had to make everyone sit down and start eating! We shared our funny Mom stories; it is always good to hear that another Mother has gone through the same thing you have. Good therapy. And a good way to get me to finally clean my poor house a bit because when people come into a new house, they always want a tour.

After everyone left, I had the best feeling and was a happy and motivated Mom the rest of the day. Wow, it is amazing what taking a little time for myself will do! (Note to self: do that more often.)

Today (Saturday) is my niece, Mya's 1st birthday and we unfortunately could not travel over to her party but I did mail her a dress that I made for her. I should have tied the back ties so it would be cinched cuter at the waist for the pic, but you get the idea.

Then miraculously, Preslie and Hunter went to a friend's to watch a movie while Mack was napping and I was able to make Preslie a bag for the new scriptures she got for her b-day. I made pockets for her pictures of Jesus and the scripture markers her aunt and uncle gave her.
I have been having a lot of fun sewing lately. I have a lot of undone projects and a few I want to start.

My weekend is shaping up nicely, and Dax just called this evening and he is coming home tonight instead of tomorrow night! Lucky me!

what's shakin' bacon

So far this week---

DONE: All laundry

arrange cub scout meeting

solve a building problem we encountered
get tires rotated and slow leak fixed

state safety inspection

car registration

parent teacher conference

call phone company to install phone line

teach Preslie to ride a 2-wheeler! (see video clip)

TO DO:

train new cub scout committee

Finish weening the baby by Friday

clean apartment again and again

Primary presidency meeting

Have a 1 year old b-day

call Questar for gas hook up

plus the usual:

keep family fed, dressed, bathed, on time, and happy

reading & homework

scriptures and prayers

re-load all kitchen drawers and dishwasher hourly

mail, bills

errands for the builders

try and have a marriage.... seriously it feels like I haven't hung out with my husband for forever! He went hunting last Thurs-Sunday, then went straight to work and working on the house or go to scouts. We finally broke away for a few minutes together tonight and it helped me. I need a buddy in all this madness and he is IT. Here is a pic of him tucking in his shirt after I told him he'd better watch out or he'd sunburn his butt crack from bending over so much.

His uncle Kirk is the other guy in the picture. Kirk and his son Coy have been framing since last Thursday but have been away from their home for a couple weeks now. It must be so hard on them to have to sleep on a cot and have NOTHING to do after work except watch scribbly TV or wander around our HAPPENING town. We appreciate them so much and hope to get the framing done and roof on so they can go home to their family.

personal revelation

I don't get it. Preslie was never attached to a binky or her bottle as a baby, nothing. And then boom, when she was around 2 she stared sucking her finger. Dax and I wanted to put the kibosh on that right away so we went and got the stuff you paint on their fingernail that tastes yucky. We read the ingredients to make sure it was safe: Cayenne pepper and citric acid. Cool. We painted it on Preslie's index finger and a minute later she popped the finger in her mouth, pulled it back out and said, "Mmm. Spicey Oranges!"

We've tried band-aids, hot sauce, rewards. Nothing was permanent enough. Then suddenly she is 5 and losing her teeth. We really drilled it into her that she needed to stop before her permanent teeth were in. Well, now she's 6 and their in and she's still sucking her finger.

Then one day at the grocery store check stand, I notice the cashier's crazy fake fingernails and I got an idea! Trying to explain it over the phone to the local salon receptionist was another thing.

"You want to get ONE nail done?"

"Yes"

"HOW old is she?"

"Six"

"Ok, hold on......."

I don't care that she or anyone else, including my husband, think I am nuts because I think it's going to work. So after the salon thing didn't pan out, I rang a friend in my ward that does her own nails and explained the sitch to her. She too, thought I was wacko but was more than accommodating, and did Preslie's nail this afternoon...

And guess what? It's TOTALLY WORKING!

Mother's Day 2008

Loved all the "Happy Mother's Day"s and hugs from my kids today. And a big huge thank you to my hero, Dax, who not only made breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but took the baby for a drive so I could shut my eyes for a bit. I love you four with all my heart!

In my 6 years as a Mother, I am constantly analyzing and evaluating my role. I have come to know that Motherhood has the most specialized yet most wide ranging job requirements of any other job I know of. And their are no real classes that are required before you become a Mother, it is all on-the-job training and comes with the steepest learning curve I've ever encountered.

Besides loving, caring, nurturing, and providing the basic life-sustaining needs to their children, Mothers are:

Creative- how many different fun ways have we come up with to get our kids to take a bite of food, put on their clothes, clean up their toys, or do their chores?

Physically Fit- Moms can hold their babies for hours on end (longer than dad can) chase and catch a straying toddler in a store, in sacrament meeting, or before they run into the street. We play tag, give underdogs and piggy back rides, carry sleeping children from the car to their beds, and dance with our children. We are constantly "lifting, twisting, and bending."

Teachers- Moms teach the obvious things...walking, using a spoon, and using the toilet. They also teach their kids to dress themselves, sweep the floor, organize their toys, brush their teeth, make their bed, and manage money. They teach their kids table manners, counting, colors, letters, numbers. They teach of God and Jesus Christ and Their Plan for us. They teach by example how to live, to make good choices, to treat other people, to serve, to be positive, and most of all to love.

Mediators- I now know through blogging that other people's kids really do fight with each other and throw tantrums and all that fun stuff. Helping our children (or ourselves) reconcile differences is something moms do every day.

Mathmeticians- Brand A Diapers cost 21.99 and have 108 diapers in the box. Brand B diapers cost $16.99 and have 92 diapers in the box. Brand B is clearly the better deal!

Cooks- it doesn't matter how gourmet she thinks she is, Mom is the first person kids go to when they are hungry.

Moms are excellent at:

Meeting Deadlines- who can build a book report display by next Tuesday, bake 3 dozen cookies for pack meeting tomorrow night, prepare an FHE lesson by tonight, and get a child fed and out the door for school on time with all their necessary signed papers and library books in 10 minutes? A mom, that's who!

Multi-tasking- Moms can give spelling tests, saute onions, and shovel baby food all at the same time!

Mommies do a LOT, obviously. But the coolest thing is that they care so much about what they do and who they do it for, that they are willing to do it for no monetary compensation, and many times minimal recognition (thank goodness for Mother's Day and wonderful, encouraging husbands). Moms have to be tough to stand up and show the world that children and families are the most important thing there ever was. And they do it with class, grace, and a dang tasty batch of chocolate chip cookies.

To all the Mothers out there (especially my own): I salute you!

Gooney Monster: The Next Generation

When Lance was here Saturday, he walked into the kitchen to get a drink and we heard him say, "Holy Cow!" Dax looked at me and said, "He saw the kids' room." Yeah...it isn't the cleanest. Actually, it is ALWAYS a total disaster. I work on it with them at least once a week and a day later it is back to looking like this...

I've organized it and re-organized it dozens of times. I've tried to make it easy for them to put things away. I also go through things and throw away and DI stuff every few months. I have explained to them numerous times how to keep their room clean. I don't know what else to do.

So after Lance mentioned how crazy their room is, he said, "Looks like Gooney Monster needs to come visit." I had totally forgotten about Gooney. It was a big green cloth sack with eyes and a huge drawsting mouth that my mom made when we were little kids. Gooney came and ate all the toys that we would not keep picked up. I think he would keep them for a week. I can't remember. But bless my mama for being so creative. And for dealing with the messes of EIGHT children.

I told the kids about Gooney and that they had until bed tonight to pick up any toys they wanted to save from Gooney's grasp. I think they thought it was just a big fun game because they were fine to get all their toys picked up for them, even if they were taken away. This is what our Gooney made off with tonight after the kids fell asleep.

Gooney will visit again in one week. I don't know if this tactic will work. Eventually, they might start to get it when they have no toys left. I am not sure, though, because Preslie said earlier today, "If Gooney eats all of our toys, we'll just get more for Christmas!" Um, no.

I'm still thinking about the specifics for our Gooney, like what it will take to get their toys back, or consequences for their continued tornado-like play habits. I realize they are very imaginative kids and get very into their playing, and I appreciate that. And we also don't have cable so their days consist of making more messes than kids that sit in front of the TV. But they've got to know that this is a ridiculous way to live.

The sad thing is, I wouldn't be surprised if I have to clear another path to their beds to tuck them in tomorrow night... More on this subject later...

mama lessons

A wise friend of mine told me of a time when her nine-year-old son was two and she caught him in the fridge destroying what was once a beautiful Thanksgiving pie. Imagine the horror as she sees the pie smeared all over the fridge, the floor, and her son's face and clothes. "The damage was done," she told me, "and so I could either get mad, or go get my camera." She now has a priceless snapshot of her once two-year-old in action.

I have thought of that a few times this week as my 4-year-old has been trying to refine me into a strong, patient mother. Time after time, he has been into the fridge eating the shredded romano cheese. I should have ran to get my camera when I walked in to find several dollars worth of cheese piles on the kitchen floor. I should have kept my cool a little better when I found little pieces cut out of a scrapbook page I was working on. I did finally remember to get my camera when my son wanted to go outside and play with his sister but refused to put his own socks on, ordering everyone else to do it for him. The camera thing really works. It takes the edge off the frustration. He finally did decide to get some socks out of his drawer so he could go out.

Most parents go through the "terrible twos" with their kids. Is there such a thing as "the frustrating fours?" I think I'd trade it for the terrible twos right now! Every age has its stages, I guess, and at least he is just as cute and sweet as he is frustrating!

3rd time's the charm

We are so in love with this baby! The first 2 months of a baby's life are pretty crazy for the mom and dad. But this has definitely been my best newborn experience. I can attribute this to a few things:

1. Mack sleeps at night. I really think this has a lot to do with how smoothly the transition goes with having a baby. Getting sleep not only allows mom to recover faster but helps attitude and perspective and gives the energy it takes to run a family and a home.

2. I've learned a few things along the way. This being my 3rd time around, I have a different perspective than I did with my first and even my second (but especially my 1st). I wish I would have known then how fast a baby grows up and to not worry about all the little things I thought I was missing out on. The sacrifices are great, true, but they are so short-lived that if you focus on them, you will totally miss the good stuff about having a baby.

3. Things are so much better when no one is thrashing on the baby- translated: spacing your kids out a bit can be a blessing. The 1 and 2 year old Preslie was a beast to baby Hunter. She was a baby herself! Now that they are older, it was so worth having them close, but I have to say that this almost 4 year span between my boys has been wonderful. The older kids really understand that the baby is a living human that will get hurt if you poke his eyes, pull him off the couch, pinch his arm, etc.

4. There are more people to enjoy this with. My other babies were mostly enjoyed by my husband and me alone (Preslie was too young to get it), but now we have 4 people that love and adore this little baby and it makes it so fun! Love truly multiplies when you divide it among more people!