A man in our ward was hit by a car and killed yesterday. He has a wonderful wife and 5 children. The youngest is in high school, a son on a mission, one that just returned from a mission, and 2 older children. My heart ACHES for his wife. Every time I have talked about it today, tears have welled up in my eyes for this woman who lost her husband, best friend, and father of her children.
It is always a shocker when someone dies unexpectedly. It makes me remember how temporary life is. WHY is that so easy to forget? I always think everything is so permanent- my life and youth (I'll always be 18 in my mind) and good health and also my hard times and struggles. It is so hard to accept that all the good things I have may change at any moment and yet I can't wait for the stuff I don't like to hurry and be done.
On Monday I got a call about someone in town putting together a project to gather blankets and clothing to ship over to Zimbabwe. I guess these people literally have nothing. It gets down to 30 degrees at night and they have no heat, so they sleep all together in a pile to stay warm. I have been camping in a tent in the cold, but I can't imagine those conditions day in and day out and trying to keep little children warm without proper clothing or blankets. I was excited to have the opportunity to help any way I could and give my kids the chance to serve people who really need it. They were excited, too.
We put together a big box of things and took it to the stake center. I was really glad my kids had this experience. They had a hard time understanding that some people don't have heat in their house or clothes or blankets. Preslie kept asking, "Can't they just plug in a heater?" or "What if they don't like these clothes?" I explained over and over that some people have no clothes and if they were given something to keep them warm, they would be so happy to have it.
My kids have never gone without and it was good for them to think about people who do. It made me think about how selfish and ungrateful we can be. There are a hundred things I want for my house, my yard, and my closet. I would love to take a trip or buy my husband a four-wheeler. Our country is so civilized that we have dreamt up new ways to spend our time and money for so long that these things have become necessities. In America, we stress about wearing the right boots for the season or having a perfectly designed house or the latest vehicle or toy or having our kids in a bunch of different activities. It's ironic that many of these same people have a wooden plaque on their wall that reads, "Simplify". And I know there is a balance. There is a certain standard of living that we almost have to live by because that is how our country has evolved. Technology has allowed us to accomplish more and acquire goods easier. I am not going to spend my time weaving fabric to make my kids clothes. But I do have an obligation to dress my kids in clean, modest clothes. But to spend a lot of time and money on that would be ridiculous when you think of how little time we really have to raise our children and teach them and enjoy them. And that is if nothing unexpectedly takes them or us.
I don't really know where I am going with all of this. I guess the past few days are making me realize my desire to live each day with a purpose. And honestly, I am still trying to figure out what my purpose is. What specifically do I have to contribute to my family and the world at this stage in my life?
6 comments:
you said it so well. your post really touched me. we get so caught up in things that don't really matter. and it's important to remember that the world is much bigger than our little surroundings. that's great that you were able to teach your kids a life lesson.
i just noticed preslie's quote by her photo. so funny. annie says "way much" too or when i'm doing her hair that it "way hurts" -ha.
I love this post. It is so true how we need to reflect on what we have and not what we want. I constantly find myself trying to do this. I have visited countries where they have nothing, in fact I have a son that is my son today because his parent's had nothing, and yet I still find myself always wanting more. It is a constant battle for me to be content, which ironically makes me frustrated:) You do so much for other people and have a big heart. You touch many people's lives and are a fantastic Mom and wife. I think you're doing just what you are supposed to be doing.
I don't think you were fishing for compliments, but I have to tell you how wonderful you are anyway. Seriously, I remember in our student ward you were this high-energy mom of two that was still able to bear your testimony often and I looked up to you. Now, as I check out your blog, I can see that nothing has changed. You're a great example and your testimony shines in everything you do. If that's all you accomplish in this life, I think that's pretty good :)
My neighbors 15 month old niece just passed away after an accident. Some of your thoughts are exactly like mine. I guess the best thing we can do is live without regrets on how and where we spend our resources (time, money etc.)
I think being a Mom with little ones at home our purpose (although broad as it sounds) is to be that soft place for our children. Being that constant reminder to them how much they are loved by our Heavenly Father and just how special they truly are.
Okay longest comment of my life :) and I am not sure that it even makes sense lol
Great post. It was a good day for me to read this. We really DO need to simplify--but most of us really don't. thanks for the reminder of what's really important. That story breaks my heart.
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